So there’s a real weird pattern here.  And I mean a completely reliable one at that.  It never fails that every time you start to breastfeed, you poop your pants.  And every time we change your diaper, you pee all over yourself.  Usually all the way to your face.  I am not exaggerating when I say that both of those things happen at least once per day.  Just now your mother went to change you before she fed you.  You peed all over yourself.  After she cleaned you up and sat down to feed you, you pooped your pants so bad that some started coming out the side, and she had to get back up and change you again.

You need to learn that there is a time and a place for those things.  Forgot potty training, we need to diaper train you.